Our Relationship Therapists Share How to Cope with Friendship Breakups

Friendship breakups can feel as heartbreaking and disappointing as romantic splits. Sometimes the paths of our lives start to move in different directions and our friendships evolve. The friendships we create can be for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. We connect with others based on common interests, opinions, and life circumstances.

The endings of these relationships can leave us feeling lost and confused. Friendships can end because of a specific event or issue, or sometimes they can slowly diminish without us even realizing it.

Here are some tips our therapists have put together to aid you in navigating a friendship breakup.

Why Do friendships end?

-Breaking of trust

-Physical or emotional distance

-Difference in views

-Misunderstandings or disagreements

- Unresolved power differential

- Abuse

How to Cope with friendship breakups:

1) Process the relationship dynamic

Give yourself the space and time to honor the relationship and grieve the loss of it going forward. Take the time to evaluate the lessons learned within the friendship and what good came out of the relationship.

These are some questions to sit on and ask yourself when processing the shifting of your friendship. Did the friendship teach you something? Did you subconsciously back out of the relationship, or put in more than the other party? What memories can you look back on and still be fond of? Where can you take accountability in challenges within the relationship? How can you grow and learn from this relationship dynamic so It does not develop in other friendships?

It may feel supportive to process the relationship dynamic with a trusted person like another friend, family member, or professional mental health counselor to help recognize any blind spots that you might be missing in your reflection.

2) Lean into self-care:

Like any breakup or loss in your life, friendship break ups can create feelings of grief, sadness, and even anger. Channel these feelings and energy into yourself care practices. Get out for a walk in nature, listen to your favorite music, treat yourself to your favorite meal. Being extra gentle with yourself when processing the ending of the friendship. It is okay to feel sad, angry, or maybe even resentful for a period of time. This is normal and natural.

When you feel ready, release the emotions that arise in healthy ways that feel safe and nourishing to you. Emotions are motivators and encouragers of movement-allow yourself to move and release the feelings and thoughts that come up that do not serve you.

3) Create space for new friendships:

Have you ever heard the saying, “when one door closes, another opens”? When you create the space for other friends or new friends, these connections have room to grow and blossom.

Dedicate your time and energy into relationships and friendships that feel nourishing during this time. When we put our thought and energy into relationships that have ended, are toxic, or are struggling, we often forget about the relationships that are supportive and healthy for us- and perhaps are even missing opportunities for potential friendships that could start to grow from even the smallest of interactions. If it feels resonate to you, try a new fitness class, neighborhood meet up, or social group- you never know what connections could be waiting for you unless you put forth effort and put yourself out there!

Just like relationships with family, colleagues, and even romantic relationships, break-ups do not have to last forever. Sometimes a “break” is necessary to move and shift within the relationship and taking time and space from a friendship can help heal some of the broken parts within the dynamic. Other times, a friendship breakup is the healthiest decision for all. All of these experiences help us grow as individuals and teaches us lessons on not only how to be a friend to others, but a friend to ourselves.

Are you struggling with a friendship breakup? We have several relationship therapists at Serene Mind who can help you process these transitions and explore these relationship dynamics. If you feel you need support, please feel free to reach out to us at hello@serenemindpysch.com, or call us at 813.321.8280. We are here to help you while you continue on your path!