5 Ways to Parent Like a Pro

Parenting like a pro involves continuously learning, adapting, and prioritizing the well-being and development of your children. Our kids and teens really do need all our love and care. Of course it is hard to remember this among moments of stress and frustration. Times with our kids is very valuable and they learn everything from us.

Here are 5 tips to help you become a more effective and nurturing parent:

1. Be Present and Engaged:

   Spend quality time with your children and be fully present during interactions. Engage in activities that interest them and show genuine interest in their lives. Having fun with your child or teen can set them up for success, not to mention boost their confidence as well.

2. Set Clear Boundaries and Expectations:

   Establish consistent rules and expectations, and communicate them clearly to your children. Consistency helps children feel secure and understand what is expected of them. Kids and teens thrive from consistent and similar expectations. Remember they are learning if the world is safe and this is a keep indicator in regard to safety.

3. Practice Positive Discipline:

   Focus on positive reinforcement and constructive discipline rather than harsh punishments. Encourage good behavior with praise and rewards, and use consequences that teach valuable lessons. Try to redirect and avoid meltdowns as much as possible. Although, if a meltdown does happen be prepared to listen, validate and not fuel the situation.

4. Listen Actively:

   Practice active listening when your child wants to share something with you. Show empathy and validate their feelings, even if you might not agree with them. Kids and teens love validation and empathy. This helps them feel connected and also helps them learn that you are a safe person to go to in case of any dangers presented to them.

5. Be a Role Model:

   Children often learn by observing their parents' behavior. Be a positive role model by demonstrating the values and behaviors you want to instill in them. Our kids and teens need great people in their lives. The great thing is you can be one of these people. Teach them things that you wish you had learned and always be the person you needed at their age.

Being a parent is no easy gig. Everyday is full of new challenges and curve balls. You really have to remember you are doing the best you can with what you have.

Do you feel that you need more parenting support? Our Parenting Group is coming to you this September. It will be online for a total of 8 weeks. Pre-register now by emailing hello@serenemindpsych.com

4 Ways Social Skills Can Help Me Succeed

When we think of our childhood, for many of us moments in social settings stand out. These social situations are the very essence of our memories. Social skills can play a crucial role in your success across various aspects of life. The importance of social skills sometimes is underestimated, but the reality is without social skills success is weary.

Here's how social skills can help you succeed:

1. Improved Communication:

   Effective communication is a cornerstone of success in both personal and professional settings. Social skills training helps you develop active listening, assertiveness, and empathy, enabling you to express yourself more clearly and understand others better. When you can communicate confidently and empathetically, you build stronger connections and foster positive relationships with others.

2. Enhanced Networking:

   Networking plays a vital role in career growth and personal development. By honing your social skills, you can become more comfortable in social settings, making it easier to initiate and maintain conversations with new people. This can lead to valuable connections, mentorship opportunities, and potential collaborations that can boost your success in your chosen field.

3. Conflict Resolution:

   Conflict is inevitable, but how you handle it can make a significant difference in your success. Social skills training equips you with the ability to manage conflicts constructively. You learn how to stay calm in tense situations, express your concerns without hostility, and find solutions that are mutually beneficial. This skill is invaluable in personal relationships and workplace dynamics.

4. Increased Emotional Intelligence:

   Emotional intelligence involves understanding and managing your own emotions as well as recognizing and empathizing with the emotions of others. Social skills training helps you develop emotional intelligence, which is crucial for making sound decisions, building trust, and motivating and inspiring others. It also allows you to handle stress more effectively and maintain a positive outlook in challenging situations.

In summary, social skills training empowers you to communicate effectively, build strong networks, handle conflicts with grace, and understand and manage emotions. All these abilities contribute to your overall success, both in your personal life and in your professional endeavors.

Why do Women Need Support Groups?

In today’s world, women are facing many challenges that effect all aspects of their life. From trying to balance their family, career, self-image, societal expectations, gender bias, and a myriad of other issues women may face in their lifetime. Support groups can help make facing these challenges just a little easier. Having community and others that can relate to your experiences, empathize, and provide support can help tremendously in navigating life’s stressors.

Here are some ways women can benefit from support groups:

Emotional support:

The purpose of a support group is to give people the space to freely express their thoughts, emotions, and experiences; in a judgement free zone. Having the ability to share your feelings with others who can empathize and provide support can give us a great sense of relief and comfort that can translate to experiences in our day to day.

Empowerment and solidarity:

Support groups can provide a safe space for women to come together, share their experiences, and empathize and support one another. Having this space to connect with other women can help us feel validated, seen, and empowered to face the challenges ahead. There is power in numbers and having people you can connect with that you likely wouldn’t have otherwise met can give us perspective and support we didn’t know we needed.

Sharing knowledge:

Support groups don’t only provide emotional support but knowledge and resources to take on challenges. The great thing about talking with other people that have gone through similar things is that we have likely found resources, information, and ways to cope. The exchange of knowledge can be seen through things like strategies to help balance our lives, navigating relationships, or managing mental health struggles. Wisdom and perspective are some of the most valuable things that can help us in life, having support groups with a group of women you can connect with can help further this aspect of our lives.

Community:

Being a woman can be an incredibly isolating. When our society expects us to have a career, partner, children, take care of our looks and health, and have good relationships with friends, it can be hard to juggle it all. We have many times been conditioned to put others before ourselves and this can be isolating. Support groups can give us the space to connect and feel accepted by others. We all crave belonging and community and a group can help make us feel less alone.

Education:

Many support groups are facilitated by therapists, coaches, or enthusiasts on a topic. Either way, there will likely be a goal of educating, this could look like being taught ways to engage in self-care, stress management, or boundary setting. There may also be “homework” such as journaling prompts or other tasks to do for the time between group.

Having the tools to combat our struggles is healing and can help us build our confidence. Support groups can help women throughout all life stages and experiences many of us will face. Finding a group, you can connect with and feel inspired and empowered by can help us in positive ways all around. They do not need to be done in person and there are many you can find that are done online. Your people are out there, and you will find them, when you do, you can only grow as a person.

5 Ways to Positively Communicate

How can positive communication help you? When we can communicate our thoughts and feelings in an effective and positive manner, it can help boost our confidence and make us happier. Positive communication improves all aspects of our life and can open so many doors in our lives from self-esteem to relationships, to jobs and many other areas of our lives. There are many factors that go into effective communication and some you can implement with just little effort and the right tool.

Here are some ways you can improve your positive communication skills:

Empathy:

The first step in positive communication is empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand and share what others feel. Its important to acknowledge where people come from and why they feel or do certain things that are desirable and undesirable. When communicating with someone to encourage them to make a change saying something like “I understand that that this process is stressful” or “I understand that anxiety is common, and you aren’t alone in this”. Encouraging and understanding language can make your positive communication all the more effective and impact outcomes.

Body language:

Open body language is key in positively communicating. If your arms are crossed or your body is turned away from someone it can already feel like you’re on the defensive or aren’t receptive to what they have to say. Positive body language looks like upright and open posture, keeping your body and head faced towards them, nodding your head in understanding, keeping your palms open, and smiling. Implementing positive body language can make the difference in your communication being effective.

Active Listening:

Are you listening to the words coming out of their mouth so you can respond; or are you taking in what they are saying and taking a second to form your thought and how you want to say it? Knowing the difference and actively trying to do the second can be so incredibly helpful in communicating and taking in information. Many times, we just want to react and say what we’re thinking as quickly as possible, but we might miss vital information or nonverbal communication. Maintaining eye contact, slowing down, taking in information, and thinking before we respond can help improve our positive communication skills.

Staying Away from Negative Terms:

Any words that shut down a conversation or would make someone likely feel defensive or bad about themselves or the situation should be avoided as much as possible. Using would like won’t, don’t, can’t, never, all have a negative connotation that comes with them. Along with this trying to you “I” language can help the other person more receptive to what you’re saying. For example, saying “You don’t do xyz for me” say “I really like when you do xyz and it makes me feel appreciated.” Just making the conscious choice to positively change your wording can make the whole difference in how effective your communication is.

Offer Help:

It can be a daunting task to change what you’ve always done and are comfortable with. When asking someone to change what they are doing you might meet some resistance. Their response might be disappointing or frustrating but it’s something you should be prepared for. Offering help or alternatives can be beneficial in making the task of change more palatable and attainable. This is where meeting others with empathy is helpful, understanding where they come from and why they do things we don’t like can aid in finding ways help them change their actions for the better. If your partner or kids aren’t behaving in a desirable way think about why they might be acting like that. Is something going on at work, school, or home? Do they need help with their routine to become more efficient? Are they struggling with their mental health and are lashing out in other way? Try opening up an ongoing discussion with them in a positive, empathetic, and understanding manner and together you can figure out what needs to change in order to make everyone’s life a little better. This sentiment can be applied to pretty much anything with anyone regardless of if it’s in your personal or work life; sometimes we just need a little help and don’t know how to ask for it.

Breathwork for Mental Health

Breathwork is now a commonly used modality in mental health counseling, therapy, and other healing practices. Popularized by its sister practices yoga and meditation, breathwork is a natural way to reduce anxiety, stress, depression, panic, and even grief. More and more individuals are giving daily breathwork practices a try before attempting to manage these symptoms with medication therapies.

What is breathwork?

Breathwork is not just simple breathing- breathwork is a focused, intentional breath that is repeated several times depending on the targeted goal. Although you are physically using your body while participating in breathwork, this is also a mental exercise.

How does breathwork improve emotional symptoms I may be experiencing?

Breathwork gently pushes you toward tapping into your parasympathetic nervous system, or the “rest and digest” function of the body. In our modern world, we are constantly on the go, stimulated, and on guard. Living in this state keeps us in “fight, flight, or freeze” mode, disconnecting from our bodies and focusing on survival. Living in a constant vigilant or hypervigilant state can create havoc on the body, leading to burnout. Breathwork brings us back to our bodies, helping us get in touch with what we are truly feeling, mentally, emotionally, and even physically.

How do I know if breathwork would be helpful for me?

Before participating in a breathwork session, talk to your primary care doctor. Certain breathwork practices are contraindicated for specific physical ailments such as COPD, individuals with pacemakers, or individuals who are being treated for serious cardiac diseases. The effects of breathwork on mental health have the green light from your doctor, connect with a breathwork practitioner to explore which types of breathwork may be a good fit for you.

Are you interested in exploring breathwork as a part of your therapy journey? We are here to help. We have therapists that are trained in breathwork practices that can incorporate breathwork into your talk therapy sessions. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists can aid you in your healing journey.

4 Ways to Sharpen Your Social Skills

Social skills are a vibrant part of life. They help us connect and share with each other, they help us grow and learn, not to mention they help us feel heard and understood. Social skills are an incredibly important skill that school do not always teach. Having the ability to socialize brings meaning and value to our life. Some of us are more skilled in this area, some of us could use improvement in this area. Either way, maybe you need a little guidance on how to improve your social skills?

Here are 4 ways to sharpen your social skills:

1. Overcome mental blocks:

   Try and let go of things holding you back mentally. Some of us shy away from conversations or meeting new people due to the fear of being judged. Let go of the “what if” thinking mentality and challenge yourself to be brave.

2. Create a safe mental space for yourself:

   By feeling safe in your own body you can regulate your nervous system. This can help you stay connected and grounded. You can create a safe space through calming techniques, meditations and grounding exercises. Use your senses to bring yourself back into the social space you are in.

3. Approach someone new:

   Go and say hi to a new person. This can be a challenge if we are worried about judgement and do not feel safe. Make it fun, and try an ice breaker to reduce your tension. A great way to do this is by using a joke or laughing to make the conversation flow and reduce your anxiety.

4. Go to a new place:

   Visit a new place and try to venture outside of your comfort zone. Getting out of your routine can help you learn to confront your fears. Start small, go to somewhere new within a proximity of your comfort zone and then branch off from there. This will also make your goal more attainable.

Social skills are such an important, under rated skill. To be successful and live our life to the fullest we need connection and a sense of belonging. Social skills can help us create a sense of community to live life alongside our family, friends and people of the world.

What is a Support Group and is it Right for Me?

Support groups allow people to talk openly about problems and stressors with others who may be going through similar issues. These groups’ purpose is to help build community and connection while working towards a common goal. At Serene Mind Counseling, our groups are run by one of our therapists or counselors on staff. Here are some things you should know before you go to a support group.  

Who are support groups for?

Support groups are for people to come together, share and discuss. It is a safe space to unite and collaborate. Our group therapist facilitator will host and have a new theme each week. Groups are meant to create a sense of community. We are all about growing and sharing together.

What do you do during support groups?  

Support group activities include discussing what might be causing problems or talking about our emotions. Not everyone has people in their lives that they can discuss these things with, so having groups with others going through similar stressors or can relate to what you are going through can help tremendously. Other activities include giving attendees journaling prompts or other tasks to do in-between sessions. We share amongst our group to help you draw perspectives and connections during the group.  

What if I miss a session? 

It’s no big deal! Life happens, and other commitments get in the way; it’s important we don’t beat ourselves up about things that might be out of our control. If you can’t make it for one or two sessions, no big deal, try to come to the next one. These groups aren’t going anywhere and will be here for you when you can make it. New people are coming to every session, so don’t feel like you’ll be behind if you don’t come for a session or two.  

What if this group isn’t right for me? 

Like with friends, coworkers, or even family, we might not click with people right away or even at all. It is not the fault of them or us just that each person’s personality, interests, or needs are different from what we need or can give. We don’t let that stop us from finding others we click with, the same goes for support groups. We might just not mesh with the people in it or not have a good experience. Please don’t let this deter you from seeking help; give it 2 or 3 sessions to make a fully informed decision and come in with an open mind, if the group still isn’t for you, that's okay. This doesn’t mean that another group won’t be right for you, find another group and try again. 

How to Support the Women in Your Life

Being a woman is hard work. We live busy lives and are expected to have multiple responsibilities. We are always on the go, trying to do more to satisfy the people around us. The expectations placed upon on us by our kids, families and society can be greatly consuming. Our world is not always the most empathetic place towards people who want to slow down, take a break or recharge.

Here are 4 ways to support women and lift each other up:

1. Set realistic expectations:

   Having expectations that are realistic can help encourage everyone to do the best they can without creating unwanted pressure. The pressure we feel as women to navigate both home and work life is already daunting. Having boundary that gives us space to navigate home life and work life at different times of the day, can help create a better balance and let us take a moment to focus on one task at a time. This can in turn make us more productive and reduce stress.

2. Ask them if they need help:

   It is okay to see your mom or wife and ask them if they need help. It is also okay for a woman to say yes to accepting help. Sometimes we get so caught up in our own needs and self worth that we forget we can pause and ask for help. Asking for help is a sign of self awareness and it means you are more in tune with your needs.

3. Ask them how they are feeling:

   On the same note, it is okay to ask a woman how they feel. Sometimes giving us space to talk about how we actually feel can help ground us and reconnect us to what is actually important. When we get caught up in the everyday go, go, go of life we forget to pause and enjoy the life we have created and the people around us.

4. Remind them to take a break:

   Tell the women in your life the importance of resting, reseting and relaxing. We are told that our society only values the constant worker and the one who does the most. The opposite is actually needed at times. the more we learn that everything we have is in the right here and right now, the more fortunate we can actually see that we are. We do not need anything more, we have it all and now can take a moment to rest.

Women are at times undervalued and this can present setbacks for many of us. We are the doers, the go getters, the soccer moms and caretakers. Women are known to neglect themselves. By realizing that taking time to rest and support each other can actually be healthy and healing, we can become the best version of ourselves.

Do you want more support from women like you? Come join our Women’s Group, every last Friday of the month from 6 pm to 7:30 pm.

4 Ways to Teach Kids Healthy Boundaries

Teaching children boundaries creates a foundation of understanding limits within healthy relationships. By instilling boundaries from a young age with your child, they will learn and build skills to not only respect the boundaries of others but create their own.

Children actually crave boundaries and structure- these foundations help them feel safe and secure.

1) Setting an expectation

When teaching your child about boundaries, set an expectation around the boundary you have in mind. Boundaries and limits can be social, physical, and emotional. Are you wanting to teach your child to refrain from using disrespectful lor vulgar language? Instill that hitting siblings is not tolerated in your home? TV time is limited to 30 minutes a day?

Set an expectation around what boundaries you would like to instill. Try to help your child understand that the boundaries you create are ones that you have decided are appropriate for you. This helps to teach them autonomy and may encourage them to think about what boundaries or limits they may have. Explain to your child what the boundary is and why you have decided it needs to be instilled from your behalf.

2) Instilling a boundary- and sticking to it

Often times, we want to cut our kiddos some slack if boundaries are crossed. We may think that we are being “cool” or even just understanding; but if you let the line be crossed once, it will be crossed again. When setting your expectation, be very clear about how you will stick to the boundaries that you create.

3) Leading and teaching by example

Be open and honest about the personal boundaries you have set in your life for other family and friends. For example, you can explain to your child, “I do not allow people to speak to me in a disrespectful manner. I hope you do not allow that either”. When observing and noticing what boundaries you set in place, this helps a child create a sense of what is acceptable in social situations. Not only are you teaching them how to respect others by instilling boundaries, you are also teaching them how to respect themselves.

4) Instilling consequences that if boundaries are crossed

When discussing the boundaries you would like to instill, explain to your child what the subsequent consequences would be if the boundary is crossed. For example; if your personal boundary is that you do not allow hitting in your household, explain to your child while setting the boundary what the consequence would be so there are no surprises if they were to engage in crossing that boundary. If the event occurs where your child hits you or a sibling, you can revisit the conversation of instilling the boundary, expectation, and consequences; and explain why the consequence will be followed through with. This also ties back to adhering to the boundaries you set in place.

Be sure that the consequence is related to the offense. In this example, if your child hits you or another child in the home, then a consequence would be that they are not allowed to play or be around the person they hit until they can keep their bodies safe. Traditional consequences like taking away toys or electronics seldom work in these situations because the consequences are not related to the offense. You will often see the offense repeated if you take this discipline route.

Instilling boundaries isn’t always easy, but you got this!

Do you feel that therapy would benefit your child? Do you need some more guidance in parenting your child with boundaries? This is a specialty at Serene Mind. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists is a good fit for you and/or your child.

3 Ways to Build Connections with Your Teen

Teens are a unique group of people and they wanted to be treated as such. It can be difficult to connect with your children once they reach adolescence. They naturally crave more independence and want to find an identity outside of their parents; with that, teens are feeling bigger emotions that can cause them to be more distant, agitated, or isolated. All of this is normal but finding reconnection with them through one of the most developmental times in their life can be pivotal in their development as a person. Ideally, we want our children to come to us with any questions, concerns, or thoughts they can’t fully understand on their own and be a safe space for them.

Here are some ways you can help reconnect and build a better relationship with your teens:

1.Open Up About Yourself

Your teen wants to know about you. How much did you really know about your parents as a teen? How much of that information did you get from them or was it from family members and their friends? It can be a very connecting experience to talk to your kids about who you are outside of “mom” or “dad”. Talk about experiences from high school, college, and early adulthood; things they can relate to or might be going through currently. Once we can humanize ourselves to our children and see each other as real people and not just an authority figure over them, you can connect on a deeper level.

2. Find a hobby you both like

Bonding over a like interest is a great way to encourage communication and connection. Whether it is something you both choose or something they already like that you might too, finding hobbies is a great way to connect with anyone in your life. Though teens might act like they are disinterested by everything, they’re not. It’s just a matter of finding the right activity they enjoy and are willing to do with you. Having a hobby, you do with them even just once a month can be a great time to connect and build trust in one another.

3. Knowing How to Handle Our Emotions

We model our behavior to our teens and they learn from us. Inevitably, teens will mess up; how we handle those mess ups can be detrimental in how teens will manage them later. Are we meeting them with shame and hostility? Or are we meeting them with empathy and compassion? If your emotions are always all over the place and anger is your first response to mess ups, it probably won’t be anything new for your teen. Screaming and yelling likely won’t get the desired effects we are looking for but only make teens retreat and hide things later.

Emotional dysregulation often comes from a place of anxiety. If we can get our general daily anxieties under control through things like selfcare, therapy, or medication, if necessary, we can manage our life stressors with better coping skills and compassion. This will all help how we react to our teens mess ups and impact when and how the tell us they messed up or are thinking of doing something you might disapprove of.

It is a process to rebuild connection with teens and these things do not happen overnight. Don’t be discouraged if they aren’t receptive at first, just keep trying! It will become easier over time. Connections and meaningful relationships take months to develop and consistency is key.

Do you or your teen struggle to connect with each other? Have you thought about teen counseling, counseling for yourself or family therapy? We can help in all these therapy realms. Our therapists would love to support you.

Our Therapists Share 6 Social Skills for a Healthier You

Humans are social beings. We seek connection, unity and inclusiveness. As we grow older it becomes more difficult to connect with others. We become more selective, stricter with social guidelines of whom we could befriend. Socializing can feel like hard work for many of us. What if there was a way that could help us socialize more openly, with confidence and positivity?

Here are 6 ways to help you regain connections and better socialize with others:

1. Be open minded:

   Realize that having an open mind is a key to making new lasting relationships. Going into a new place, event or social setting as if you are ready to make friends and listen to others. This mindset will help you attract the people you want to create new relationships with.

2. Love yourself:

   By loving and knowing who you are you can be more confident. Go into an event knowing what you bring to your relationships and portray this. This confidence can help others be more attracted to your energy, which will also make you appear to be more socially available.

3. Practice what you want to say:

   By rehearsing and reciting how to introduce yourself, you can make yourself less nervous about the event. Having a couple of funny lines or stories is a great way to meet people. We tend to gravitate to stories about dogs, pets, babies and common interests. Come up with a way to gain potential connections by having a couple of lines that you want to say.

4. Find people with common interests

   People like you, want to be friends with you. The key here is you have find them. Having similar interests makes us automatically more likely to connect and be more able to socialize with each other. When we have similarities a group or bond can naturally grow.

5. Know your non-negotiables:

   We all have those pet peeves or values that are deal breakers in any relationship. Go into a socially setting knowing what your non-negotiable are. For some people it is telling the truth, for others it is a specific sense of humor, or possibly even an affinity for dogs. Know what your deal breakers are in a relationship and if you hear them when you are getting to know someone, realize this may be ultimately what breaks the relationship.

6. Go out and practice:

   Try, try and try again. The more you expose yourself to social settings and new people, the more practice you will have in socializing. This will make you better equipped to meet others and help you lower any social anxiety. Take baby steps and slowly but surely put yourself out there. You can do this!

Socializing in this post pandemic era is a struggle. Humana want to feel as a part of a community and culturally some of us seek this more often as well. People have become very used to isolation and are not even aware of how our social skills may have regressed. It is important to be empathetic with yourself, and help yourself get back out there again. Trying to connect, gaining more confidence in your social abilities and finding a great group of friends are all things you can accomplish.

Have you heard about our Serene Mind Social Skills Groups? Coming this fall we will have a social skills group for kids, teens and young adults. Each group will be geared to a different age group. We hope you come socialize with us!

How Can Love Languages Improve Your Relationship?

We all have love languages that make us feel cared for, respected, and admired. We may have different ones than our partners, or perhaps even the same!

Decoding what the 5 love languages are and how they can be implemented within a relationship can boost your relationship to a whole new level. When understanding how you and your partner interpret love and appreciation, you can try to exercise their preferred love language to help them feel seen, heard, and well, - loved! When practiced frequently, asserting your knowledge of your partner’s love language can deepen your connection and enrich your relationship is several ways. Many expressions of love and intimacy can be considered several love languages in one act or event, which gives you bonus points!

Our therapists weighed in on how to communicate to your partner your love for them using the 5 love languages system.

What are the 5 Love languages?

Physical Touch

There are many ways to express love and admiration through physical touch, such as:

 Hugs

 Kisses

 High-fives

 Arms around shoulders/back/waist

 Holding hands

 Cuddling

 Sexual intimacy

 Physical closeness and touching

Words of Affirmation

Words of affirmation are comments, phrases, and questions that validate, affirm, and acknowledge qualities and characteristics of your partner that are positive. Words of affirmation don’t have to just be physical; they can be comments based on personality, performance, situational topics, and even day-to-day tasks. Some examples can include:

How understanding love languages can improve your relationship

 “Your passion for your work inspires me”

 “You look beautiful in that dress today”

 “It must have taken so much bravery to stand up to your boss. You did a

great job handling that situation”

 “I am proud of what an amazing partner you are”

 “I notice how attentive you are to our children and that means a lot to me”

 “I am so thankful to have you in my life”

 “You really have a knack for decorating. Because of you, our house feels like a home”

 “You always have the best ideas.”

 “You make me want to be a better person”

Acts of Service

Doing a favor, completing a task, helping with a chore or errand- all of these falls under the umbrella of acts of service. Some examples include:

 Completing a task of chore, you don’t particularly enjoy like dishes or laundry

 Planning a surprise birthday party for your partner

 Helping your partner find

 Ironing your partner’s work clothes for the next day or packing their lunch

 Rubbing your partner’s feet (also could be considered quality time or physical touch)

Quality Time

Quality time can look different for many couples. You don’t have to be looking at each other the entire time for it to be considered quality time. Connecting through a shared activity and conversation can ignite intimacy within your relationship. Some examples include:

 Watching a show together

 Taking a new class together

 Playing a game

 Taking a walk

 Going on a trip

How understanding love languages can improve your relationship

 Cuddling

 Cooking dinner

 Having a conversation

Gifts

Birthdays and holidays aren’t the only time you can express love in your relationship. There are so many opportunities for you to be able to shower your loved one with gifts in meaningful ways throughout the year. Gifts don’t have to be grand or expensive, in fact, studies show that small gifts with deep meaning tend to be more attractive to individuals who prefer gifts as their main love language. Some examples of gift giving include:

 Picking up your partner’s favorite flowers on a whim

 Buying a piece of jewelry your partner has had their eyes on for their birthday

 Seeing your partner’s favorite shoes on sale and snagging them

 Buying your partner lunch

Do you feel that couples counseling could benefit your relationship? Do you want to learn more about the 5 Love languages? Do you Do you need extra support in helping your relationship flourish and grow? Couple’s counseling is a specialty at Serene Mind. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists is a good fit for you and your partner.

Our Couples Therapists Share the Benefits of Couples Counseling

Relationships ebb and flow. Sometimes it helps to get some extra support and insight into your relationship and the challenges a couple encounters on their path together. It is normal and natural to hit roadblocks as a couple. Embarking on a journey of couple’s counseling can be beneficial in so many ways. Couple’s counseling is a supportive and structured therapeutic modality designed to aid couples in navigating the ups and downs every couple faces.

Our therapists believe that these are some of the benefits of couple’s work:

What are the benefits of couple’s counseling?

1) An impartial professional to hold you accountable.

When working with a professional couple’s counselor or therapist, you therapist will provide a safe space for each partner and hold each individual accountable in a supportive, caring, and compassionate way. Your therapist will help you create goals as a couple, identify barriers that you are facing in the relationship, and maintain an unbiased stance on the concerns and issues brought up within sessions. It is imperative that the facilitator of couple’s counseling is unbiased and does not have outside relationships with either person of the relationship they are helping to counsel, to ensure that no one feels that sides are being taken when challenges are brought up within sessions. It is very important that both parts of the couple feel secure with their therapist or counselor and have trust in them.

2) Improve communication skills

A couple’s counselor can help you learn about different. communication styles, how to respond to your partner in a way that supports their communication style, and how to communicate with them in a productive way. Communication is key in relationships- effective communication is paramount in fostering safe, healthy, and loving relationships. Your therapist can provide you with tools and resources to strengthen your communication dynamic within your relationship, as well as your individual communication style. This educational and reflective piece of the work you will do in couple’s counseling will be fruitful in the therapy room as well as your day-to-day interactions with your partner, and in all relationships.

3) Gain a deeper understanding of your relationship dynamic

In couples counseling, you will learn about the different love languages, attachment styles, and how to differentiate empathy versus sympathy. Learning about these important aspects of relationships can help you identify potential challenges or barriers within the foundation of your relationship, as well as how to strengthen it. Couple’s therapists use different therapeutic modalities in each session to help uncover the inner workings of the relationship. Depending on the couple’s style, preferences, and concerns brought to sessions, couple’s counselors are highly skilled in curating a plan that is cohesive, effective, and efficient to help the couple understand their contributions to the relationship, whether those inputs are helpful or hurtful to the relationship.

Do you feel that couples counseling could benefit your relationship? Do you Do you need extra support in helping your relationship flourish and grow? Couple’s counseling is a specialty at Serene Mind. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists is a good fit for you and your partner.

3 Ways to Bounce Back From Difficult Times

As humans, we experience many ups and downs while we walk the path of life. Sometimes, certain experiences can knock us into uncomfortable places and it can be a challenge to pick ourselves back up and move forward. Sometimes we don’t even know where to begin when we want to kickstart into a new journey or stage in our lives.

Here are some tips from our therapists to help bounce back from difficult times:

Give yourself grace, respect, and love

Take your time to process the situation before taking action. Avoid making hasty decisions and forcing yourself to move forward if you are not ready. Treat yourself as you would treat a loved one who is recovering from being knocked down or is going through a challenging chapter in life. Participate in self-care practices that feel resonate to you. Some options can include:

 Cooking or purchasing your favorite meal

 Participating in your favorite hobby

 Listening to music

 Unplugging- turning off your phone and other electronics for the day

 Exercise

 Spending time with loved ones

 Watching your favorite movies

 Gardening

 Taking a walk in nature

Reflect

Think about and reflect on the situation at hand. What do you have control of? What do you not have control of? What can you change in this situation? Asking yourself these questions can help you organize your thoughts and feelings to be able to accept the circumstances you may be in to be able to move forward. If it resonates with you, journal these questions- you may be surprised what the answers are.

Ask for Help

Don’t feel afraid to reach out to friends, family, or mental health professionals if you feel you need additional support when navigating tough times. Talk through your thoughts, feelings, and concerns. Ask for and accept help if needed. Use your support system to bolster you up and work as a team to get over the hill you’re climbing when bouncing back from a hard event or process in life.

We have several therapists at Serene Mind who can help you process through recalibrating after experiencing times of difficulty. If you feel you need support, please feel free to reach out to us at hello@serenemindpysch.com, or call us at 813.321.8280. We are here to help you while you continue on your path of life!

5 Easy Ways to Manage Stress

Stress is an inevitable part of each and every one of our lives. Stress can be healthy or unhealthy depending on the amount, the duration of the stressor, and the frequency of the stress. Stress can help us grow in difficult times and help us learn how to problem solve, but with too much we can dwindle into unhealthy behaviors or even illness.

Our therapists give their 5 favorite ways to manage their everyday stressors to maintain a balance of mental clarity and challenge.

1) Unplug

When stress is present, added stimuli can impact you to a further degree. Smart phones now have “do not disturb” options to help block the distraction of incoming calls, texts, or emails. Skip a night of watching Netflix and pick up that book you’ve been meaning to read the last few months. Our minds are constantly stimulated by the lights and colors that screens emit and in times of stress, the packs on more information to our brains to process, therefore creating more stress in the mind and even body. Our therapists encourage to take a screen free day once a month to reset your nervous system.

2) Move

Exercise is key to shaking off stress on a day-to-day basis. You don’t have to hit the gym for an hour to get some stress relief- set a timer for 10 minutes and stretch. Take a walk with your dog after dinner instead of letting them play in your fenced yard while you scroll on TikTok. Tackle that yard work you’ve been putting off. There are so many ways to be creative with movement that feels resonate to you and fruitful to you.

3) Nourish

Skip the DoorDash and head to the nearest grocery store to stock up on healthy and wholesome ingredients to prepare a few meals that are simple and nourishing. Your body can battle stress with effective energy from the fuel you feed it! Carve out the time to shop for ingredients that are supportive to your physical body and energy. This can be something fun to do with your family of partner, shop altogether for the ingredients and cook a meal at home as a team. (Your wallet will thank you too!). Bonus points if you use a cookbook for your recipe and not your phone or laptop!

4) Schedule breaks

It is easy to pack as much as we can into the day to feel productive and get things done. This builds our stress levels and can lead to mental burnout and exhaustion. Schedule several small breaks through your day to rest, snack, maybe even read a magazine. One of our therapist’s favorite break time activities is breath work. This gives your mind a break from the constant “go go go” and reconnects you with how you are feeling physically, mentally, and emotionally.

5) Reevaluate time management

When you are feeling overwhelmed and overstressed, take some time to reevaluate your time management. Set timers, make a to-do list, prioritize urgent tasks, and let the little ones go for now. Break out that hard copy calendar. Use this time to get organized! An organized environment helps to foster an organized mind. When your time is managed and you can create a schedule that feels balanced, your mental load will start to shift into more of a peaceful place, leaving you feeling calmer and less scattered.

If you feel you’ve fallen into a sea of stress, you CAN make your way out of that cycle with time and support. Do you feel stuck and need some extra help? We are here to help. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists can aid you in your healing journey.

Prioritize Your Mental Health: Do Not Ignore These Signs of Burn Out

Many of us have felt the heaviness of responsibility. Some of us have felt the stress of obligation. Staying up late to finish left over work or to meet a deadline? Checking work emails and accepting calls or texts while off the clock? Agreeing to do more work to cover for a coworker?

Are the projects piling up?

When these types of scenarios pop up, it is easy to think “just this once”, or “I’ll make sure this won’t happen again”. Over time, the weight of these emotions and dynamics can lead to burnout. In a culture filled with constant stimulation, over drive, and expectations, burn out has become increasingly common.

With mindful self-care and boundaries, we can prevent burnout.

What are some signs of burnout?

1) Lack of Motivation-Avoiding and ignoring tasks, difficulty to instill effort

2) Feelings of Defeat and Hopelessness-Feeling like you can’t complete tasks or even show up

3) Performance and productivity decline-Making mistakes, taking constant breaks

4) Change in emotional demeanor-Feeling sad, anxious, angry, or frustrated

5) Concentration challenges-Feeling easily distracted

6) Detachment- Not feeling invested in or caring about the work you do

If you feel you are struggling with burnout, here are some important self-reflection questions to ask yourself:

1) Why do I feel the need or obligation to take on extra work?

2) What are the ramifications of a decline of performance and productivity on my part?

3) What is my body telling me about how I am feeling emotionally with my circumstances?

Take some time to understand and reflect on your situation and ask for additional supports if you need it. Don’t be afraid to ask for help!

How can I heal from burnout?

Recovering from a period of burnout takes time. Instilling effort to recover can often be extremely challenging when you are burnt out and running on an empty tank. Sometimes the best action to take when experiencing burn out is to leave the environment in order to heal, but sometimes you can remain in the same place with a shift of boundaries and expectations.

Here are some simple tips you can add into your day little by little to aid in recovering from burn out:

 Take a break or vacation (if feasible)

 Try to slowly add in some sprinkles of extra self-care throughout your day

 Carve out some time in nature for a walk or quiet time

 Unplug consistently

 Eat away from your desk

 Don’t check emails/turn off your phone after business hours

 Eat nourishing meals & stay hydrated

 Connect with friends, family, or a mental health professional to process your feelings

If you feel you’ve fallen into a pit of burnout, you CAN make your way out of that cycle with time and support. Do you feel stuck and need some extra help? We are here to help. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists can aid you in your healing journey.

Our Counselors Confirm, 3 Ways to Navigate Pressures Placed on Teens

Teens have great expectations placed on them these days- getting good grades, maintaining a social life, contributing to the family household- the list goes on and on. The expectations and pressures placed upon teens in our modern day and age can be stressful, overstimulating, and sometimes even debilitating. Learning to balance and juggle all the responsibilities in adolescents can be a challenge.

Here are some tips from our therapists to help you alleviate the stressors of pressure and expectations teens experience:

Prioritize Downtime and Take Time to Rest

Team sports, school clubs, social events- all these activities add up. Give yourself the time and space to get bored. Although it is important to be socially connected and physically active, it is equally important to rest.

Our culture is centric around the “hustle”, constantly moving, evolving, creating, and conversing. Prioritizing time to rest and integrate can help you focus better and become more present when you are engaged in enrichment activities and social settings. Avoid making down time a space to check your social media. Try to engage in gentle activities like reading, watching a movie, taking a nap! Find something that works for you and helps to fill your cup to the brim. It is not lazy to rest and rejuvenate- give yourself the grace and courtesy to honor self-care.

Unplug from Social Media and Technology

Teens today are constantly connected through text, social media, emails, and so many countless apps that keep them up to date. Create blocks of time to unplug and exist in the present moment. Most smart phones have “Do Not Disturb” functions where you can even eliminate the distraction of notifications coming through. You can track your screen time within your settings app as well. Becoming aware of your screen time usage can be a wake-up call to how connected you are to your phone but disconnected to your waking life.

Schedule Blocks for Creative Time

Creativity can look different for every person. Give yourself an opportunity to get in tune with and embrace your creativity. Finding this through tangible art, playing music, participating in yoga, or even organizing your closet drawer can ignite creativity. Think of activities that feel resonate to you that can connect your mind and body. Maybe try something new! Scheduling a block of time to give yourself space to spark creativity can increase your problem-solving skills, create a calming outlet, and foster confidence.

Is your teen overstimulated? Do they need extra support in navigating the stress of pressure and expectations? We offer teen counseling and rolling groups for teens that focus on many areas of life during the teenage years. Wanting to deepen the connection between you and your teen? We also offer family therapy. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or call us at 813.321.8280 for more info.

Check out our upcoming teen social skills group starting this summer here: https://www.serenemindpsych.com/teen-social-skills-group

Our Therapists Share: 7 Signs Your Teen May Be Struggling with Anxiety

More and more teens are experiencing anxiety, and the symptoms of anxiety can reveal themselves in many different ways. With the fast-paced culture and lifestyle teens live in today, fears, overstimulation, and social situations blossom into full blown anxiety. There are ways to see signs of these symptoms and help to lessen or even stop the discomforts of anxious feelings and thoughts.

Here are some common indicators that your teen may be struggling with anxiety:

Appetite changes

Some teens experience a loss of appetite and skip a meal (or even 2 or 3) when feeling extremely anxious. Others may have a significant increase in appetite.

Trouble Concentrating

The inability to complete tasks and forgetfulness falls under the umbrella of anxiety symptoms. This can also appear as task avoidance, overstimulation, overwhelm, and discouragement. Some teens may be jittery, aloof, and confused- all of these characteristics indicate anxiety may be present.

Connected to devices

Notice your teen constantly scrolling on their social media apps? Scrolling, texting, and even just the instant gratification of picking up a cell phone device can serve as a distraction from anxiety triggers, but in turn can increase them two-fold. These devices are often used as a coping mechanism to distract from the discomfort of anxious thoughts and feelings.

Withdrawal

Can’t get your teen to come out of their room when their home? Is it a battle trying to get them to eat at the dinner table, attend family functions, or even engage in conversation? Withdrawing from social interactions is a key indicator that your teen may be feeling anxious. Nervousness, shyness, visible discomfort- all contribute to a social withdrawal.

Physical Symptoms and/or Anxiety attacks

Anxiety can show many physical symptoms, including:

-Nausea &/or vomiting

-Sweating

-Shaking

-Fainting

-Stuttering

-Rapid breathing

-Racing heartbeat

Difficulty Sleeping

Restlessness and insomnia are often indicators of anxiety. When the mind is not focusing on other things or being distracted, it can revisit thoughts or feelings that are uncomfortable or anxiety provoking. This often happens during bedtime when distractions are decreased in comparison to during the day. There is less stimulation and more sitting with the self. Some teens will stay up late on social media or playing video games to distract from these thoughts and feelings, then fall asleep out of pure exhaustion involuntarily.

Academic Decline

Grades starting to slip? Anxiety may be behind it. The pressure of performing academically effects countless teens, where other teens may be distracted with other anxious thoughts that schoolwork is sent to the back burner. Check in with your teen to see how you can support them with their schooling.

Is your teen experiencing anxiety? Do they need extra support in navigating their symptoms? We offer teen counseling and rolling groups for teens that focus on many areas of life during the teenage years. Wanting to deepen the connection between you and your teen?

We also offer family therapy. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or call us at 813.321.8280 for more info.

Check out our upcoming teen social skills group starting this summer here: https://www.serenemindpsych.com/teen-social-skills-group

Understanding Adolescent Identity Development: A Guide for Parents to Help Their Teens

Hi parents! Today we wanted to write some tips to help you guide your teen through identity development! When your children are growing up, they can go through many stages of development, including changes in appearance, interests, and identity. What this means is that as our children grow into teenagers, they start the natural process of exploring themselves and asking questions about who they are, where they belong, and how to fit into the world around them.

This can be a confusing process for both parents and teens alike, so to help you better understand the evolution of teenage identity development, our Tampa-based team of therapists has put together this helpful guide to provide insight and guidance on how to foster healthy growth during this important stage in your teen's life.

In this post, we'll provide an overview of the phases of adolescent identity development and even explore ways social media can impact it. We'll also offer some tips for parents on how to encourage their teens to explore their identities in healthy and sustainable ways. Our journey begins below; let's explore!

Phases of Identity Development for Growing Teens - And How to Help

According to notable psychologist James Marcia, there are four identity statuses or phases of identity development, and here's how they may relate to your teen. 

These may include:

• Identity Diffusion:

  In this phase, a teen has not yet committed to any particular identity and is not actively seeking one out. They may feel lost or confused about who they are and what they want to do with their lives.

How can I help with this? To help your teen in this phase, provide them with opportunities to explore their interests and values while making sure they know you’re there to support them.

• Identity Foreclosure:

  In this phase, a teen has committed to an identity without exploring other options. They may have adopted the beliefs and values of their parents or peers without questioning them or considering alternative viewpoints.

How can I help with this? To help your teen in this phase, ask open-ended questions about their identity and encourage them to explore different points of view. Make sure they know it’s okay to be curious and ask hard questions about life.

• Identity Moratorium:

  In this phase, a teen is actively exploring different identities and trying out different roles and activities. They may experiment with different clothing styles, hobbies, and friend groups to find out what feels most authentic to them.

How can I help with this? In this phase, it’s important to provide your teen with a safe space to explore without judgment. Make sure they know that you love them no matter what and are available as a sounding board if needed.

• Identity Achievement:

  In this final phase, a teen has successfully developed a strong sense of identity based on their own values, beliefs, and experiences. They have explored different options and made thoughtful decisions about who they are and what they want to do with their life.

How can I help with this? In this phase, it’s important to celebrate your teen’s achievements and provide them with resources for pursuing their goals. By letting them take ownership of their identity in healthy ways, we will give them the confidence to keep growing in a positive direction.

This may seem clinical, and this advice is by no means meant to replace the support of a licensed therapist. If, at any point, this feels overwhelming, consider reaching out to our team for support. Remember, our Tampa-based therapy team is always here to support you through this process.

Impact of Social Media on Identity Development

Now let's briefly touch on social media. While social media can be a valuable tool for connecting with others and expressing oneself, it can also have negative effects on adolescent identity development.

Studies have shown that excessive social media use can lead to low self-esteem, poor body image, and anxiety. Teens may also feel pressure to conform to certain standards or expectations set by social media influencers or peer groups.

So to help with this, encourage your teen to take breaks from social media and focus on real-world activities such as sports, music, or art. By doing this, you're encouraging your teen to explore their identity in the real world in healthy ways, which we believe will have long-term positive impacts on their lives. To read more about this, check out our previous blog on 5 Ways to Help Your Teen Overcome Isolation in the Age of Social Media. 

Tips for Encouraging Healthy Identity Development - Outlining the above in an easy-to-digest format

With the above information noted, we want to make it clear that there is no one-size-fits-all solution. As a parent, there are several things you can do to support your teen's identity development, so to elaborate on this, here are the tips again in an easy-to-digest format. Read below and see if any of these resonate with you:

• Encourage exploration:

  Encourage your teen to try new things and explore different interests and hobbies. This can help them develop a better understanding of what they enjoy and what they're good at.

• Foster open communication:

  Be open and available to talk about any questions or concerns your teen may have about their identity. Create a safe and non-judgmental environment where they can share their thoughts and feelings.

• Limit social media use:

  Set boundaries around social media use and encourage your teen to take breaks from their devices. This can help them develop a healthier relationship with social media and prevent negative effects on their self-esteem and body image.

• Seek professional help if needed:

  If your teen is struggling with their identity development or experiencing mental health challenges, consider seeking the help of a mental health professional. Therapy can provide a safe and supportive space for teens to work through their emotions and develop a greater sense of self early on.

Conclusion

At Serene Mind Counseling and Evaluations, we understand that your teen's identity development can be a complex and challenging time. That's why we're excited to announce our upcoming teen social skills group starting in June. In this group, we will help your teen connect with other teens in a healthy and safe setting. To learn more, check out more information here.

Lastly, if you're interested in understanding more about how we can support your teen on this journey, please don't hesitate to reach out to us at Serene Mind Counseling and Evaluations.

Remember, your child's teenage years are a time of growth and exploration. By providing a supportive and nurturing environment, we can help our teens navigate this important stage of life with confidence and grace.

The Benefits of Social Skills for Kids + Teens

As social creatures, we thrive from connecting with others and learning from each other. In today’s day and age that is chock full of digital communications and content, we are slowly moving away from the social connection that keeps us grounded and healthy. We have carried on coping mechanisms post-pandemic, such as working from home, exercising from home, video chatting our friends instead of meeting with them in person. Online dating, social media, even school can be completed through a tiny computer screen. Kids today have grown up with these technologies, not needing to be put in social situations and environments children were once in. Even with our ever-changing world, social skills are crucial to creating a happy, confident, and competent lifestyle.

How can I help my child improve their social skills?

Registering your child for a social skills group is a fantastic way to connect them to others their age, engage them in an in-person activity, and get their social skills put to action.

Learn to connect with peers

In a social skills education group, kids & teens will have access to hands-on experience and exercises to aid them in finding ways to connect with their peers. These educational and informative groups teach kids and teens about empathy and sympathy and how to differentiate the two. Learning to embody empathy and sympathy will help to ignite and maintain relationships for your child. In learning in groups such as age- targeted social skills group, your child will inherently connect with other members of the group by shared goals, communal vulnerability, and radical authenticity. These are lifelong stills that will benefit them as they continue their paths in life.

Identify social cues

Reading a room, understanding facial expressions, and decoding tone are key skills in successful relationships; whether they be personal, professional, or even strangers you meet in your day-to-day activities and errands. A social skills education group will teach your child about these imperative skills and techniques to help them feel confident in these settings and situations.

Conversational skills

Being able to start and carry a conversation with peers, family, and people of the workplace is paramount in leading a life that is socially connected. Conversation skills are not only important for in-person interactions, but also digital communications. Social skills groups can teach your child how to initiate conversations, approach others, and continue conversations- along with skills and techniques to avoid awkward silences or disconnected comments.

Self-Confidence

When mastering foundational components of social skills, kids and teens will build their confidence with each session. These groups give kids opportunities to learn on the spot, roll play, and practice with other members of the group.

Is your child or teen needing a boost in their confidence skills? Would a social skills group help them bolster their social skills? We offer children and teen counseling and rolling groups that focus on many areas of life during the childhood years. Wanting to deepen the connection between you and your child? We also offer family therapy. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or call us at 813.321.8280 for more info. Check out our upcoming teen social skills group starting this summer here: https://www.serenemindpsych.com/teen-social-skills-group