4 Ways to Reduce Your Back to School Stress - From Our Therapists

School coming to a start can add pressure for everyone. It is important to take the time to focus on ways to make the transition as smooth as possible. Having a plan on how to tackle the new school year is important.

Here are 4 ways you can make sure this school year is smooth.

1. Create a routine - Did you know that predictability sends soothing messages to the brains of those that struggle with stress? Setting up a routine such as a regular bedtime, a daily gym session, or even a music playlist or audiobook that you listen to on the drive to/from school can help you solidify a routine. Something that will allow your brain to not be so stressed throughout the day.

2. Communication is key - When it comes to children, if you as a parent have changes in plans you should communicate that to your child as soon as possible. A child can become very stressed and anxious if they are unsure of how they’re getting home or where they are going. If they are caught up in the mix of complicated changes, it ends up being very difficult to focus on their learning.

3. Connect through questions - Go ahead and try connecting with your child through questions such as how their day went, who they sat next to at lunch, if anything funny or exciting happened throughout the day. You can even chime in with your own experiences when you were going to school and what caused you a lot of stress and anxiety. With that, you can end up asking them if there is anything that may be causing them a bit of anxiety with school.

4. Listen - Our natural tendency when we hear that someone is stressed is to try and fix it. However, when we go ahead and try to do that, we end up invalidating the other person's feelings and in turn not really helping them at all. Instead of trying to fix whatever it is that has them stressed. Try asking questions such as “How can I support you right now” or “Would you like to talk about what’s currently bothering you?” Once you listen to them, if you have a thought that you feel may be helpful, go ahead and ask them if it’s okay for you to share it.

As we all transition back to school, remember to take care of yourself too. The best support a child can have is an adult who is taking care of their own well being and mental health too!

4 Ways to Maximize Your Study Habits

As we all get back into the flow of things during a new school year, we need to find ways to help us study in a more efficient way that will allow us to stay grounded and prevent unwanted stress. You may be wondering, how can I successfully study and retain information without over stressing?

Here are a few tips to help you within this next school year and hopefully the rest of your life!

1. Space out your studying - We are all guilty of cramming for exams the day before. However, this is not the best way to study for exams! It’s best to space out your study sessions over a longer period of time. A great way to do this is to schedule an hour a day or every other day until the day of your exam. Flash cards is a great way to do this.

2. Practice! - When you look at a musician at a concert, do you think that they simply woke up one morning and knew how to play as seamlessly as they currently do? Of course not! It took them many years of practice to master and hone in on their skills. Why would you be any different? When learning a new subject practicing is VERY important. Make sure you practice as much as possible. The more you do it, the more it’ll become second nature.

3. Don’t just re-read books and notes - You may think that simply re-reading material is best and will allow you to retain the material, but it’s no different that memorizing the answers to an exam. Actually read the material and notes to understand them. If you understand what you are reading and learn how to apply it you will have a higher success rate on your exams.

4. Test yourself! - Once you are done studying and practicing as much as you can, test yourself! If you think it’s better to have someone test you instead, ask a family member or even a friend. A great way to test yourself is to use Quizlet’s flash cards or even their testing options! This will allow you to see how much you truly understand and have retained.

Following these steps will allow you to formulate a routine and healthier studying habits and in turn reduce the amount of stress as exams get closer.

Back to School Ready - From Our Therapists

Having great organizational skills is the key to success! This is the key to having a great school year as well. No one is born being organized, we can all brush up on our skills. The first thing you have to remember is to be patient with yourself while you learn a new routine. Learning takes practice and the more you practice, the easier it will become.

Here are a few tips to get your children (or yourself) ready for the new school year:

1. Use checklists - Using checklists to post assignments, chores or even reminders of what materials your children might need for class is a good habit to have. Purchase a small planner or notebook for your child and dedicate it specifically to listing homework assignments. Once they are done with homework assignments, projects or any other tasks have them cross them off. This list will give them a sense of accomplishment!

2. Break down tasks - By making tasks smaller, we make them more manageable. This makes it easier to feel accomplished, thus boosting our confidence. Use this boost to help you complete the entire project. Baby steps need to be celebrated to increase your motivation to complete your school work.

3. Organize homework assignments - Encourage your child to do their homework assignments in the order that they should be completed. A good way to structure this is by starting with the shortest or “easiest” assignment first and then moving to the longest assignment. Any bigger assignments or projects that aren’t due right away can be worked on in smaller chunks than typical homework assignments.

4. Designate a study space - Having a designated workspace and/or study space allows for consistency. Your child should ultimately have a designated work space for studying and doing homework that is quiet and away from most distractions. Ultimately, having their school supplies and materials nearby would also be best. It would also help for them to have designated study times that aren’t too long.

5. Take breaks - Having time to eat, relax and play are also important in helping us finish assignments. Taking a mental time out from learning and doing things helps us recharge. This is helpful in helping us complete an assignment, think of it as a reward for the work you have been completing.

Going back to school is never easy. Sure you may have some excitement but it is usually combined with worry. By being more organized and prepared you can make some of that worry go away. Have a great first day and month of school!

Back to School Burn Out - A Therapist’s Perspective

Back to school burnout is REAL. As a graduate student nearing the end of my degree, my biggest challenge is overcoming the idea that I just “took a bunch of time to rest” over the summer. I am supposed to feel fully charged, refreshed, and ready to go, right? 

Well, about 3 weeks into the “go mode” I now realize I am pushing myself too hard and I am starting to feel the first signs of burnout: fatigue, forgetfulness, loss of appetite, anxiety symptoms. 

It is okay and there are ways we can manage going back to school together. Here are some tips I have come up with over the years to avoid this back to school burnout:

1. Set reasonable weekly/daily goals.

   I am a week-to-week person so I typically like to begin on Monday with a list of things I would like to accomplish throughout the week, with the most important things first. I will then separate my list into days: when will I have the time to complete each task as it fits in with my week. The goal here is to provide yourself with some wiggle room. If you can only complete one task, that is okay- just make sure it is the most important one. You will get to the rest as soon as you can. 

2. Take breaks!

   They did not invent the wheel in one day! Sometimes long task lists take time and it is okay to give yourself time. Taking breaks for some of us can be difficult. Maybe we don’t know where to fit them in and we work straight through lunch or dinner. Others may take breaks that are so long they cannot get back into being productive. A great tool for this is to set timers. At the beginning of the day, as you assess your schedule, identify at least 2 places where you could stop for 10 minutes and eat a snack or go for a walk. Set those alarms in your phone and try your best to carve out time when they go off. 

3. Choose healthy relationships.

   A teen shared with me the other day, “you are the sum of your 5 closest friends.” The people that you surround yourself with can make you feel much better or much worse about your current situation. If your peers are often consumed with drama and negative attitudes, it is likely that they will begin to inadvertently bring you down with them. Finding people who maintain positive and productive relationships and attitudes will benefit you in reaching your goals and better managing your time! 

These tips may not rid you of all burn out, fatigue and anxiety but they can help to manage your symptoms. Knowing that we all have episodes of burn out can help us feel some level of comfort and relieve. You are not alone, and your struggles are real. Remember to make yourself a priority and focus on your needs too.

School is in Session, Take Care of Your Mental Health

Back to school season is here and just like that another school year begins! Sports, clubs, extracurricular activities, and crowded weekends have started and we want to make sure you are prepared, not only for the busy schedules and challenging coursework but to make sure you are taking care of your mental health. 

When life gets busy, it is easy to feel overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of it all. It is common to fall into old habits and allow life to take us over, feeling out of control. First, I want to remind you that this is normal, we cannot expect to be on top of everything at every moment of every day- we are going to get behind. That is okay. 

But, since we do not want to stay down for too long, here are some quick back-to-school tips to keep you or your kiddos in good spirits to begin and end this school year strong. 

Do the best you can to use positive language when talking about yourself and others.

Positive self-talk has been linked to better problem-solving abilities and different, more constructive thinking patterns than those who do not practice positive self-talk. These problem-solving skills help build interpersonal relationships, reduce stress and anxiety, and aid in maintaining friendships. 

Positive self-talk can be applied in different ways, all to make life easier for you. Here are some examples you may be able to adjust your negative self-talk as early as today:

1. Catch yourself.

   Taking the time to reflect on some of the things you may be telling yourself gives you the opportunity to notice, and make adjustments sooner the next time they come around. 

2. Challenge those thoughts.

   Your inner critic can be a nasty fella, are they always being truthful though? Using positive affirmations can be helpful in challenging those not-so-nice thoughts. Instead of saying “I am never going to get this right,” challenge that thought with “I am doing my best, and my best is enough today.”

3. Put it in your pocket.

   This may seem silly, but it is not uncommon for some of that negative self-talk to really take over and make you feel stuck or unable to escape them. Sometimes, you just need to take a break. After you have identified your negative thought, put them in your pocket, and decide to deal with them at another, more convenient time. Chances are that you will forget you put it there or you will not be feeling as critical later after the moment has passed. 

Incorporate routines wherever you can. 

Routines are difficult to maintain when life starts to get busy, but I am not referring to the same typical routines you may have thought of your whole life- wake up by 7am, make breakfast, shower, be in bed by 9pm kind of routine- Instead, try to just maintain hygiene by showering once a day, brushing your hair if you need to, brushing your teeth twice, and changing your clothes. Building routines around diet and exercise habits, like making sure you go outside at least once or eating at least 3 meals a day, can also be helpful in making sure you are providing your body with enough nourishment and activity to remain on task in school or in your extracurriculars. 

Lastly, don’t forget to take breaks. 

Though it may be hard to force ourselves to slow down and take a moment to ourselves, it is necessary. Breaks prevent burnout and no one wants to be burnt out. Even if you do not think you need one, it may be helpful for you to schedule one into your week, give yourself a chance to listen to your body, and adjust based on your needs. You deserve a break. You deserve to respect your own boundaries.

Parents We Can Teach Our Kids to Say No to Bullies

Tis' the season of back to school shopping, open houses and new class schedules. This time of year many teens can be anxiously awaiting the new school year. For many teens this is a positive nervous, excited feeling of the first day of school. But for some it can be very stressful, nerve wrecking and even depressing. 

The topic of bullies is one that never grows old. Bullies can be found in all schools, all grades and in all cities. The population of teens that are in middle school who are bullied is ever growing. Many parents and teens are afraid, worried and simply do not know what to do. Teach your kids how to say no. 

For starters, bullies are insecure, lonely, angry and fearful. They pick on kids and teens who are quiet, shy and mostly introverted. Bullies want to feel powerful and they believe they will gain this by controlling the emotions of another. But they could not be more wrong. 

Kids and teens who are bullied are actually strong, have their own mindset and independence. They have to be reminded that they are powerful and can stand up for what they believe in. Standing up as a teen is not always easy, but is possible. Empowering a teen who has been bullied is a step in the right direction. 

As parents, please take the time this school year to talk to your children about bullies. Your child or teen may not have the courage to approach the topic, but it is of upmost importance. Bullying is a serious offense and thus it should be treated as such. Talk to your kids about standing up for what they believe in and about saying no in difficult situations. The more they practice and role play the easier it will be, if they are confronted by a bully. 

Parents have no fear, August is here!

As the days of the new school year are slowly approaching, the summer calm is winding down. Parents are excited for their children to leave the house and be back at school. As much as I hear parents cheering, their children are not. Now if we could all just be on the same page? 

Here are some great ways for everyone to slowly transition back to school while still being in the "summer" mindset!

1. Set an adjusted bed time: Simulating a "school night" bed time prior to the start of school, will help your family begin to feel as if back to school is almost here. This is a tool to ease your kids in transitioning to an ideal bed time!

2. Schedule a time for homework: Many kids have to read books or complete projects during summer break. Right now would be a great time to make sure these assignments are completed and will be turned in on time. Sit with your kids, ask them to schedule a couple of hours a day for school work during their last summer weeks. If no homework needs to be completed, assign them homework assignments (you can find simulated school worksheets online). 

3. Plan back to school snacks: This can help ease children back to their school routine and increase their excitement for the new school year. Talk about healthy and tasty snacks that they may enjoy eating their first week back at school. This will give them something to look forward to! 

4. Go back to school shopping: For many children this is the best part of back to school. The new sneakers, shirts, notebooks and markers. Plan a budget together and go shopping together! Encourage your child to pick out an agenda book and notebooks, that they can use to start the year in an organized fashion. 

5. Explore the school: This is a must if your child will be attending a new school! It will help calm their nerves on the first day of class. Go tour the school together and find where their class is, the nearest bathrooms, office and lunch room. 

6. Talk about making and keeping friends: Discussing with your child how to meet new friends and maintain old friends is a social skill that they can always have handy. Practice meeting new kids through role-plays, to help calm their anxiety. Some children are more excited about meeting new friends and will use this as motivation for wanting to go back to school. 

Make these last weeks a back to school practice, by reminding your child of all the positive activities that await this new school year!

Back to School Tools

Yes, it is that time of year again! Moms and dads everywhere are cheering with joy. Back to school is here! In honor of this season I have found some great apps for parents and kids to stay organized and focused this school year.

This app is compared to having a personal assistant. It organizes anything you may need and you can take your items anywhere. Examples include: recipes, photos, notes, plan a party and manage home or work tasks. Visit: https://springpad.com/about

For the teen who needs structure and organization. This app assists teens in organizing class schedules, exam dates, homework, and level of difficulty of each assignment. Great tool for teens who need some task management in their lives. Visit: http://www.heapnote.com/students.html#.Uh5fOhvNk8f

Is your child artistic, do you have no room left on your refrigerator to display your child's art work? This app was made for you! Just upload your child's art work and create an art book to display all of the works of art in an organized fashion. Visit: http://www.artkiveapp.com/

Make learning fun for kids or teens! Two great apps with the purpose of teaching. Learn with Homer is interactive, fun and great for kids learning to read. Visit: http://learnwithhomer.com/
For the teen in your life, Vocabador is an interactive wrestling vocabulary game. It boasts that it helps prepare test takers for exams such as the SAT and GRE. Visit: http://www.vocabador.com/

I hope these apps make your transition to the school season a little more enjoyable!