Embracing Self-Love: A Valentine's Day Journey through Mental Health

As the world celebrates love on Valentine's Day, it's crucial to recognize that love isn't solely about romantic relationships. It encompasses the most vital relationship of all: the one we have with ourselves. In a society often fixated on external validation, it's easy to overlook the significance of self-love, especially concerning mental health.

This Valentine's Day, let's embark on a journey of self-discovery, embracing the power of self-love and its profound impact on mental well-being.

Understanding Mental Health: Before delving into the depths of self-love, it's essential to grasp the complexities of mental health. Mental health encompasses our emotional, psychological, and social well-being, influencing how we think, feel, and act. It's a spectrum, ranging from flourishing to struggling, and requires nurturing and care, just like physical health.

Challenges of Self-Love: In a world inundated with unrealistic standards and relentless comparisons, cultivating self-love can be arduous. Many individuals grapple with feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt, and criticism, exacerbating mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. Moreover, societal stigma surrounding mental health often hinders individuals from seeking help or acknowledging their struggles.

Embracing Self-Love: Despite the challenges, practicing self-love is not only attainable but transformative. It involves fostering a compassionate and accepting relationship with oneself, recognizing one's worth beyond external achievements or validations.

Here are some strategies to embark on this journey:

1. Self-Compassion:

   Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a loved one facing difficulties. Embrace your flaws and imperfections with empathy, acknowledging that they're part of what makes you human.

2. Prioritize Self-Care:

   Dedicate time to activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul. Whether it's meditation, exercise, or pursuing hobbies, prioritize self-care as an essential component of your routine.

3. Set Boundaries:

   Learn to say no to commitments or relationships that drain your energy or compromise your well-being. Establishing boundaries is crucial for protecting your mental health and honoring your needs.

4. Practice Gratitude:

   Cultivate a mindset of gratitude by acknowledging and appreciating the blessings in your life, no matter how small. Gratitude shifts your focus from what's lacking to what's abundant, fostering a sense of fulfillment and contentment.

5. Seek Support:

   Don't hesitate to reach out for support from trusted friends, family members, or mental health professionals. Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness, and can provide invaluable guidance on your journey towards self-love.

Celebrating Love in All Forms: As we celebrate Valentine's Day, let's broaden our definition of love to encompass all forms of affection and connection. Whether it's romantic love, platonic love, or self-love, each holds immense significance in enriching our lives and nurturing our mental health. By embracing self-love, we not only enhance our well-being but also cultivate deeper, more authentic relationships with others.

This Valentine's Day, let's embark on a journey of self-love and mental well-being. By prioritizing self-compassion, self-care, and gratitude, we can overcome challenges and embrace our true selves wholeheartedly. Remember, love begins within, and by nurturing our relationship with ourselves, we pave the way for a brighter, more fulfilling future. Happy Valentine's Day, from me to you – may your heart be filled with love, today and always.

Navigating the Labyrinth: Unraveling the Stressors of Being a Woman in Today's World

In the dynamic landscape of the 21st century, women continue to face a myriad of challenges that can significantly impact their mental health. From societal expectations to workplace pressures, the stressors women encounter are complex and interconnected.

This blog aims to delve into the multifaceted aspects of being a woman in today's world, examining the unique stressors that contribute to the mental health struggles many women face.

Societal Expectations:

The expectations placed on women can be overwhelming. Society often imposes rigid standards regarding appearance, behavior, and life choices. The pressure to conform to these ideals can lead to a constant sense of inadequacy and self-doubt. The struggle to meet societal expectations can take a toll on mental well-being, contributing to anxiety and depression.

Balancing Act: Work, Family, and Personal Life:

The modern woman is often expected to juggle various roles, including that of a professional, a caregiver, and an individual with personal aspirations. Balancing these roles can be incredibly challenging, leading to feelings of exhaustion and burnout. The constant need to meet conflicting demands may result in a compromised sense of self and increased stress levels.

Gender Inequality:

Despite progress, gender inequality persists in various spheres of life. The wage gap, limited opportunities for career advancement, and societal biases can create a hostile environment for women. The constant battle against gender-based discrimination can cause chronic stress, negatively impacting mental health.

Body Image Pressures:

The media's portrayal of an unrealistic standard of beauty places undue stress on women. From airbrushed magazine covers to social media influencers, women are bombarded with images that can erode self-esteem and trigger body image issues. This societal pressure to meet an idealized version of beauty can contribute to anxiety, depression, and eating disorders.

Reproductive Health Challenges:

Women's reproductive health, including menstrual health, fertility issues, and pregnancy-related challenges, can have a significant impact on mental well-being. The stigma surrounding these topics and the lack of open conversations may contribute to feelings of isolation and distress.

Sexual Harassment and Assault:

The pervasive issue of sexual harassment and assault adds an additional layer of stress for women. Fear, shame, and trauma associated with these experiences can lead to long-term mental health consequences. The #MeToo movement has shed light on the prevalence of such incidents, but the aftermath continues to affect the mental health of survivors.

Being a woman in today's world comes with a unique set of stressors that can have profound implications for mental health. It is crucial to acknowledge and address these challenges to foster a more supportive and inclusive society. Open conversations, destigmatization of mental health issues, and advocacy for gender equality are essential steps toward creating a world where women can navigate their lives with resilience and well-being.

Empowering Women: The Transformative Power of Mindfulness, Self-Care, and Friendships in Women's Groups

In the fast-paced and demanding world we live in, women often find themselves juggling numerous roles and responsibilities. The importance of self-care, mindfulness, and meaningful connections cannot be overstated. Women's groups, dedicated to fostering mindfulness, self-care practices, and building friendships, offer a transformative space where women can prioritize their mental health and well-being. In this blog post, we will explore the profound impact of women's groups on fostering mindfulness, encouraging self-care, and cultivating enduring friendships.

Mindfulness in Women's Groups:

1. Creating a Sacred Space:

   Women's groups provide a safe and nurturing environment for practicing mindfulness. In these groups, participants can engage in meditation, deep breathing exercises, and guided relaxation sessions, creating a sacred space where they can focus on the present moment and cultivate a sense of inner calm.

2. Mindful Reflection and Sharing:

   Mindfulness in women's groups goes beyond individual practice. Group settings offer opportunities for mindful reflection and sharing, allowing women to express their thoughts and feelings without judgment. This collective mindfulness enhances emotional intelligence and promotes a deeper understanding of oneself and others.

3. Stress Reduction and Resilience:

   Regular mindfulness practices within women's groups contribute to stress reduction and increased resilience. By learning to stay present and manage their responses to stressors, women can navigate life's challenges with greater ease, promoting mental well-being and emotional balance.

Self-Care Practices:

1. Holistic Wellness Workshops:

   Women's groups often organize workshops that focus on holistic self-care practices. These may include sessions on nutrition, exercise, sleep hygiene, and other aspects of well-being. Participants gain valuable insights and practical tools to integrate self-care into their daily lives.

2. Personalized Self-Care Plans:

   Through discussions and activities within the group, women can collaboratively create personalized self-care plans. These plans cater to individual needs and preferences, empowering each participant to prioritize their well-being and develop sustainable self-care routines.

3. Encouraging Boundaries:

   Women's groups provide a supportive space for discussing and establishing healthy boundaries. Through open conversations, women can explore the importance of setting limits, saying no when necessary, and creating a balance between their personal and professional lives.

Building Lasting Friendships:

1. Shared Experiences:

   Women's groups foster a sense of camaraderie through shared experiences. Whether navigating life transitions, celebrating achievements, or supporting each other through challenges, these shared moments create deep bonds that form the foundation of lasting friendships.

2. Empathy and Understanding:

   The empathetic environment of women's groups facilitates a deep understanding of each other's journeys. This understanding, coupled with active listening and open communication, strengthens connections and encourages women to be authentic in their relationships.

3. Celebrating Diversity:

   Women's groups often bring together individuals from diverse backgrounds, creating a rich tapestry of experiences and perspectives. Celebrating this diversity not only enriches the group dynamic but also broadens each woman's understanding of the world.

4. Ongoing Support Networks:

   The friendships formed in women's groups extend beyond the group meetings. These networks become invaluable sources of support, encouragement, and inspiration in both challenging times and moments of joy. Knowing that they are not alone in their journey enhances a woman's sense of belonging and resilience.

Women's groups that focus on mindfulness, self-care, and building friendships offer a profound space for personal growth and well-being. By embracing mindfulness practices, incorporating self-care into their lives, and cultivating meaningful connections, women can navigate the complexities of modern life with resilience, authenticity, and a strengthened sense of community. As we recognize the transformative power of these groups, we celebrate the collective strength of women supporting each other on their journeys toward mental and emotional flourishing.

Embracing the Season: A Comprehensive Guide to Holiday Self-Care

As the holiday season approaches, the festive cheer often comes hand-in-hand with increased stress and overwhelming demands. Amidst the hustle and bustle, it's crucial to prioritize self-care to ensure a joyful and rejuvenating holiday experience.

In this blog post, we'll explore practical tips and strategies to nurture your well-being during the holidays, allowing you to truly savor the magic of the season.

1. Set Realistic Expectations:

   • The pressure to create the perfect holiday can be overwhelming. Begin by setting realistic expectations for yourself and your celebrations. Understand that imperfections are a natural part of the season and that the most important aspect is the quality time spent with loved ones.

2. Create Boundaries:

   • Establishing boundaries is key to maintaining balance during the holidays. Learn to say no to commitments that may contribute to excessive stress. Communicate your limits to friends and family, ensuring that you have the time and energy to engage in activities that bring you joy.

3. Prioritize Self-Reflection:

   • Take moments for self-reflection amidst the holiday chaos. Consider the significance of the season for you personally and what aspects bring you the most fulfillment. This introspection can guide your choices and help you align your activities with your values.

4. Mindful Holiday Planning:

   • Plan your holiday activities mindfully, focusing on what truly matters to you. Prioritize events and traditions that bring joy, and consider scaling back on those that feel more like obligations. Quality over quantity is the mantra for a fulfilling holiday experience.

5. Self-Care Rituals:

   • Integrate self-care rituals into your daily routine. Whether it's a warm bath, a few moments of meditation, or a brisk winter walk, carve out time for activities that replenish your energy and promote relaxation. These small rituals can be a source of calm amidst the holiday frenzy.

6. Healthy Eating Habits:

   • While indulging in holiday treats is part of the fun, be mindful of your overall eating habits. Ensure a balance between festive delights and nourishing meals to support your physical well-being. Staying hydrated is equally crucial, especially in colder climates.

7. Connect with Loved Ones:

   • Prioritize meaningful connections with loved ones. Engage in activities that foster a sense of togetherness, whether it's a family game night, a cozy movie marathon, or a heartfelt conversation over a cup of cocoa. These moments contribute significantly to the joy of the season.

8. Embrace the Power of "No":

   • Recognize that it's okay to decline invitations or opt-out of certain activities. Saying "no" when necessary is an act of self-care that allows you to preserve your energy for the things that truly matter.

In the midst of holiday celebrations, it's easy to overlook personal well-being. However, by incorporating these self-care strategies into your holiday routine, you can navigate the season with grace and mindfulness, ensuring that the festivities are not only joyful but also rejuvenating for your mind, body, and spirit. Embrace the spirit of the season by prioritizing yourself and creating a holiday experience that aligns with your well-being goals.

5 Truths About Adult Social Skills That Impact Your Mental Health

Navigating social interactions is an integral part of adult life, and the way we engage with others can have a profound impact on our mental well-being. While social skills may seem complex, they hold the power to shape our relationships, self-esteem, and overall mental health.

In this article, we'll explore five truths about adult social skills and their significance for your emotional wellness.

1. Social Skills Are Essential for Mental Health

It's no secret that human beings are social creatures. Our connections with others influence our emotional state, from joy and contentment to stress and loneliness. Engaging in positive social interactions provides a sense of belonging, which is a fundamental aspect of mental health. Healthy relationships create a support network that can offer comfort during difficult times, reducing the risk of mental health struggles.

2. Social Skills Can Be Developed and Enhanced

Contrary to the belief that social skills are innate traits, they are learned behaviors that can be cultivated and improved over time. Just like any other skill, practice and patience play a crucial role in enhancing your ability to communicate, empathize, and connect with others. By seeking out opportunities to engage in social interactions and learning from your experiences, you can gradually become more skilled in navigating diverse social scenarios.

3. Mindful Communication Nurtures Positive Interactions

Effective communication is the cornerstone of successful social interactions. Practicing mindfulness – being fully present in the moment – during conversations can significantly impact the quality of your connections. Active listening, showing empathy, and responding thoughtfully demonstrate that you value and respect the other person's thoughts and feelings. Such mindful communication fosters deeper understanding and strengthens bonds, contributing to improved mental well-being.

4. Boundaries Are Vital for Self-Care

While fostering connections is essential, maintaining healthy boundaries is equally crucial for your mental health. Clearly defining your personal limits in social interactions ensures that you engage in relationships that are respectful, supportive, and mutually beneficial. Boundaries protect your emotional energy, prevent burnout, and allow you to prioritize self-care – all of which are vital components of a well-balanced mental health regimen.

5. Quality Over Quantity in Social Connections

In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to equate the number of social connections with popularity and well-being. However, the quality of your relationships matters more than the quantity. Cultivating a few deep and meaningful connections can provide a strong emotional support system that significantly contributes to your mental health. These connections offer a safe space for vulnerability and authenticity, reducing feelings of isolation and promoting emotional resilience.

In conclusion, adult social skills are not only relevant but crucial to your mental health. Engaging in positive social interactions, honing your communication abilities, setting healthy boundaries, and fostering meaningful connections all play a pivotal role in your emotional well-being. Remember that growth in social skills is a journey, and with consistent effort and a willingness to learn, you can transform your interactions and improve your overall mental health.

By recognizing these truths and actively working on your social skills, you empower yourself to create fulfilling relationships that positively impact your emotional and psychological state. As you navigate the intricacies of social interactions, remember that each step you take toward improvement contributes to your journey of self-discovery and mental well-being.

Do you have an interest in improving your social skills? Our social skills adult group is starting soon. Email us to reserve a seat today.

4 Ways to Teach Kids Healthy Boundaries

Teaching children boundaries creates a foundation of understanding limits within healthy relationships. By instilling boundaries from a young age with your child, they will learn and build skills to not only respect the boundaries of others but create their own.

Children actually crave boundaries and structure- these foundations help them feel safe and secure.

1) Setting an expectation

When teaching your child about boundaries, set an expectation around the boundary you have in mind. Boundaries and limits can be social, physical, and emotional. Are you wanting to teach your child to refrain from using disrespectful lor vulgar language? Instill that hitting siblings is not tolerated in your home? TV time is limited to 30 minutes a day?

Set an expectation around what boundaries you would like to instill. Try to help your child understand that the boundaries you create are ones that you have decided are appropriate for you. This helps to teach them autonomy and may encourage them to think about what boundaries or limits they may have. Explain to your child what the boundary is and why you have decided it needs to be instilled from your behalf.

2) Instilling a boundary- and sticking to it

Often times, we want to cut our kiddos some slack if boundaries are crossed. We may think that we are being “cool” or even just understanding; but if you let the line be crossed once, it will be crossed again. When setting your expectation, be very clear about how you will stick to the boundaries that you create.

3) Leading and teaching by example

Be open and honest about the personal boundaries you have set in your life for other family and friends. For example, you can explain to your child, “I do not allow people to speak to me in a disrespectful manner. I hope you do not allow that either”. When observing and noticing what boundaries you set in place, this helps a child create a sense of what is acceptable in social situations. Not only are you teaching them how to respect others by instilling boundaries, you are also teaching them how to respect themselves.

4) Instilling consequences that if boundaries are crossed

When discussing the boundaries you would like to instill, explain to your child what the subsequent consequences would be if the boundary is crossed. For example; if your personal boundary is that you do not allow hitting in your household, explain to your child while setting the boundary what the consequence would be so there are no surprises if they were to engage in crossing that boundary. If the event occurs where your child hits you or a sibling, you can revisit the conversation of instilling the boundary, expectation, and consequences; and explain why the consequence will be followed through with. This also ties back to adhering to the boundaries you set in place.

Be sure that the consequence is related to the offense. In this example, if your child hits you or another child in the home, then a consequence would be that they are not allowed to play or be around the person they hit until they can keep their bodies safe. Traditional consequences like taking away toys or electronics seldom work in these situations because the consequences are not related to the offense. You will often see the offense repeated if you take this discipline route.

Instilling boundaries isn’t always easy, but you got this!

Do you feel that therapy would benefit your child? Do you need some more guidance in parenting your child with boundaries? This is a specialty at Serene Mind. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists is a good fit for you and/or your child.

Our Therapists Share 6 Social Skills for a Healthier You

Humans are social beings. We seek connection, unity and inclusiveness. As we grow older it becomes more difficult to connect with others. We become more selective, stricter with social guidelines of whom we could befriend. Socializing can feel like hard work for many of us. What if there was a way that could help us socialize more openly, with confidence and positivity?

Here are 6 ways to help you regain connections and better socialize with others:

1. Be open minded:

   Realize that having an open mind is a key to making new lasting relationships. Going into a new place, event or social setting as if you are ready to make friends and listen to others. This mindset will help you attract the people you want to create new relationships with.

2. Love yourself:

   By loving and knowing who you are you can be more confident. Go into an event knowing what you bring to your relationships and portray this. This confidence can help others be more attracted to your energy, which will also make you appear to be more socially available.

3. Practice what you want to say:

   By rehearsing and reciting how to introduce yourself, you can make yourself less nervous about the event. Having a couple of funny lines or stories is a great way to meet people. We tend to gravitate to stories about dogs, pets, babies and common interests. Come up with a way to gain potential connections by having a couple of lines that you want to say.

4. Find people with common interests

   People like you, want to be friends with you. The key here is you have find them. Having similar interests makes us automatically more likely to connect and be more able to socialize with each other. When we have similarities a group or bond can naturally grow.

5. Know your non-negotiables:

   We all have those pet peeves or values that are deal breakers in any relationship. Go into a socially setting knowing what your non-negotiable are. For some people it is telling the truth, for others it is a specific sense of humor, or possibly even an affinity for dogs. Know what your deal breakers are in a relationship and if you hear them when you are getting to know someone, realize this may be ultimately what breaks the relationship.

6. Go out and practice:

   Try, try and try again. The more you expose yourself to social settings and new people, the more practice you will have in socializing. This will make you better equipped to meet others and help you lower any social anxiety. Take baby steps and slowly but surely put yourself out there. You can do this!

Socializing in this post pandemic era is a struggle. Humana want to feel as a part of a community and culturally some of us seek this more often as well. People have become very used to isolation and are not even aware of how our social skills may have regressed. It is important to be empathetic with yourself, and help yourself get back out there again. Trying to connect, gaining more confidence in your social abilities and finding a great group of friends are all things you can accomplish.

Have you heard about our Serene Mind Social Skills Groups? Coming this fall we will have a social skills group for kids, teens and young adults. Each group will be geared to a different age group. We hope you come socialize with us!

Prioritize Your Mental Health: Do Not Ignore These Signs of Burn Out

Many of us have felt the heaviness of responsibility. Some of us have felt the stress of obligation. Staying up late to finish left over work or to meet a deadline? Checking work emails and accepting calls or texts while off the clock? Agreeing to do more work to cover for a coworker?

Are the projects piling up?

When these types of scenarios pop up, it is easy to think “just this once”, or “I’ll make sure this won’t happen again”. Over time, the weight of these emotions and dynamics can lead to burnout. In a culture filled with constant stimulation, over drive, and expectations, burn out has become increasingly common.

With mindful self-care and boundaries, we can prevent burnout.

What are some signs of burnout?

1) Lack of Motivation-Avoiding and ignoring tasks, difficulty to instill effort

2) Feelings of Defeat and Hopelessness-Feeling like you can’t complete tasks or even show up

3) Performance and productivity decline-Making mistakes, taking constant breaks

4) Change in emotional demeanor-Feeling sad, anxious, angry, or frustrated

5) Concentration challenges-Feeling easily distracted

6) Detachment- Not feeling invested in or caring about the work you do

If you feel you are struggling with burnout, here are some important self-reflection questions to ask yourself:

1) Why do I feel the need or obligation to take on extra work?

2) What are the ramifications of a decline of performance and productivity on my part?

3) What is my body telling me about how I am feeling emotionally with my circumstances?

Take some time to understand and reflect on your situation and ask for additional supports if you need it. Don’t be afraid to ask for help!

How can I heal from burnout?

Recovering from a period of burnout takes time. Instilling effort to recover can often be extremely challenging when you are burnt out and running on an empty tank. Sometimes the best action to take when experiencing burn out is to leave the environment in order to heal, but sometimes you can remain in the same place with a shift of boundaries and expectations.

Here are some simple tips you can add into your day little by little to aid in recovering from burn out:

 Take a break or vacation (if feasible)

 Try to slowly add in some sprinkles of extra self-care throughout your day

 Carve out some time in nature for a walk or quiet time

 Unplug consistently

 Eat away from your desk

 Don’t check emails/turn off your phone after business hours

 Eat nourishing meals & stay hydrated

 Connect with friends, family, or a mental health professional to process your feelings

If you feel you’ve fallen into a pit of burnout, you CAN make your way out of that cycle with time and support. Do you feel stuck and need some extra help? We are here to help. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists can aid you in your healing journey.

How + Why to Prioritize Your Self Care

In a culture and society that is all about the hustle and bustle, self-care often takes a backseat to things we find ”productive” like work, exercise, and chores around the house. What is important to learn is that self-care is productive, and very important for our health and wellbeing. Self-care helps us give our minds a break and to relax.

Unplugging from the constant stimulation of texts, busy work schedules, to-do lists and helps us feel more into our parasympathetic nervous system and release from the on-edge feelings of always being connected.

Taking the time for self-care will actually improve your productivity- helping you feel energized and refreshed.

• Eat Well

• With our fast-paced lifestyle, it is easy to swing by a drive-thru fast-food restaurant or pick up a grab-n-go meal from your local grocery store. Grant yourself just 30 minutes each week to create a meal plan for yourself. Meal prepping is helpful to create an easy and quick meal that can be stored in the fridge and heated up in minutes. By taking a small amount of time during the week to prep and plan meals, you are saving more time (and money!) in the long run- not to mention fueling yourself with higher quality ingredients and important nutrients that fast food and frozen/prepackaged meals can’t provide.

• Take a Break from Social Media

• Find yourself constantly scrolling? This is a hint that you may be overstimulated or bored. Let yourself rest by unplugging, even if it is just for an hour. Constantly staying connected keeps our brains on overdrive, taking away from the present moment.

• Maintain your Sleep Schedule

• Up late to meet that deadline? Staying up to cram for an exam? Indulging in a Netflix marathon until 2am? When these habits pile up, it starts to take a toll on your physical, and even mental health. Sleep is the body’s way of regenerating, and it should be treated as a non- negotiable self-care routine. Create a schedule that works best for you and try to stick with it. Go to bed around the same time each night so your body creates a natural rhythm. Waking up feeling rested and refreshed will help you feel even more productive in your day-to-day tasks and activates.

• Social Time

• Connect with you friends (in person!) Need we say more? Social time is so important for our health and wellbeing. Feeling connected and that we belong is crucial to our sense of self-esteem and emotional health. Call up a friend or family member and make plans, even if it is just for a quick coffee meet-up. Even short interactions can help foster and nourish the foundation of our relationships and help us feel supported and secure.

• Get Bored; Embrace Leisure

• It is easy to pick up your phone and scroll when you are feeling bored or uneasy. When you’re feeling bored, let the creativity take over. Pick up the paintbrushes and create something new! Or maybe grab your notebook and start those journaling prompts you’ve been piling up. Sign up for that last minute cycle class.

• When you give yourself space to be bored and have free time, you’ll start to remember the things you enjoy and want to engage in more often. Sometimes the spur of the moment leisure activities can spark even more creativity and inspiration in other areas of your life!

Looking for a therapist or life coach to help you on your self-care journey? We are here to help. Email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists can aid you in your healing journey.

Relationship Therapists Share: What are the Signs of a Codependent Relationship?

Codependent relationships are more common than we realize. These relationships are not only present in romantic partners; but can also be a dysfunctional dynamic in friendships, parent/child relationships, and even work relationships.

Codependent behaviors generally stem from social childhood or your teen years. Some factors that can contribute to these behaviors are:

- Experiencing abuse

- Having a parent or family member who suffers from an addiction, illness, or other health impairment

- Growing up with a controlling parent or caregiver

- Experiencing abandonment

- Experiencing divorce

- Being bullied as a child

In a codependent relationship, there is a person who is a caretaker and a person who takes advantage of the caretaking behaviors. Both individuals in the relationship are dependent on the behaviors of the other, feeling like they need the other person in their lives to function.

There is a need to be needed for the caretaker, and a need to be taken care of from the other individual in the relationship. There are several indicators that you could possibly be in a codependent relationship.

Here are a few factors to help you determine if you are:

People Pleasing

Putting your needs aside to please your partner or other party in your relationship is a main sign of a codependent relationship. At first, these actions may seem like a loving gesture of compassion, but then start to spiral into an unhealthy habit. The caretaking individual in the relationship often values the opinions of others rather than listening to their own intuition or following their preferences.

They want to make others happy, in fear that others won’t love or even like them anymore if they push back or disagree. Often times, the caretaker does not like to make decisions without the approval and input of the other individual of their codependent relationship, or even others in their lives. People pleasing becomes a currency to be liked or loved by others- needing this affection from others, but especially the other person in the codependent relationship. This stems from the codependent relationship and can start to bleed into other relationships.

Lack of Boundaries

The concept of emotional (and sometimes physical) boundaries can be blurred in codependent relationships. For the caretaking individual, they may feel underappreciated by the other person; yet continue to please them and be mistreated. They may offer consistent unsolicited advice, enable inappropriate or unacceptable behavior, and sometimes even feel responsible for the other person’s actions.

For the individual who takes advantage of the caretaker, they may push the envelope in terms of boundaries. This person is typically aware of the unconditional love and support of the caretaker, so they often feel comfortable mistreating, taking advantage, and disregarding the feelings of the caretaker. Both people in the relationship can fall into a pattern of denial about their behaviors within the relationship.

Self Esteem Challenges

For the caretaking individual, their self-esteem, self-worth, and self- image usually revolves around the assurance, validation, and approval of the other party in the relationship. They lack inner trust and confidence in many cases. There is a great fear of being rejected, disliked, or viewed negatively. Sometimes these feelings evolve and creates a victim mentality. These individuals often do not like to be alone and feel comfort when in the company of others, especially the other half of the codependent relationship.

For the individual who takes advantage of the caretaker, they often have an inflated self- esteem and ego. They feel they are worthy of the consistent caregiving treatment and expect and accept nothing else.

Do you feel like you are in a codependent relationship? Are you looking to break free from the relationship patterns you have found yourself in? At Serene Mind, we are here to help. You can also email us at hello@serenemindpsych.com or give us a call at 813.321.8280 to set up an intake appointment to see if one of our therapists is a good fit for you!

Our Relationship Therapists Share How to Cope with Friendship Breakups

Friendship breakups can feel as heartbreaking and disappointing as romantic splits. Sometimes the paths of our lives start to move in different directions and our friendships evolve. The friendships we create can be for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. We connect with others based on common interests, opinions, and life circumstances.

The endings of these relationships can leave us feeling lost and confused. Friendships can end because of a specific event or issue, or sometimes they can slowly diminish without us even realizing it.

Here are some tips our therapists have put together to aid you in navigating a friendship breakup.

Why Do friendships end?

-Breaking of trust

-Physical or emotional distance

-Difference in views

-Misunderstandings or disagreements

- Unresolved power differential

- Abuse

How to Cope with friendship breakups:

1) Process the relationship dynamic

Give yourself the space and time to honor the relationship and grieve the loss of it going forward. Take the time to evaluate the lessons learned within the friendship and what good came out of the relationship.

These are some questions to sit on and ask yourself when processing the shifting of your friendship. Did the friendship teach you something? Did you subconsciously back out of the relationship, or put in more than the other party? What memories can you look back on and still be fond of? Where can you take accountability in challenges within the relationship? How can you grow and learn from this relationship dynamic so It does not develop in other friendships?

It may feel supportive to process the relationship dynamic with a trusted person like another friend, family member, or professional mental health counselor to help recognize any blind spots that you might be missing in your reflection.

2) Lean into self-care:

Like any breakup or loss in your life, friendship break ups can create feelings of grief, sadness, and even anger. Channel these feelings and energy into yourself care practices. Get out for a walk in nature, listen to your favorite music, treat yourself to your favorite meal. Being extra gentle with yourself when processing the ending of the friendship. It is okay to feel sad, angry, or maybe even resentful for a period of time. This is normal and natural.

When you feel ready, release the emotions that arise in healthy ways that feel safe and nourishing to you. Emotions are motivators and encouragers of movement-allow yourself to move and release the feelings and thoughts that come up that do not serve you.

3) Create space for new friendships:

Have you ever heard the saying, “when one door closes, another opens”? When you create the space for other friends or new friends, these connections have room to grow and blossom.

Dedicate your time and energy into relationships and friendships that feel nourishing during this time. When we put our thought and energy into relationships that have ended, are toxic, or are struggling, we often forget about the relationships that are supportive and healthy for us- and perhaps are even missing opportunities for potential friendships that could start to grow from even the smallest of interactions. If it feels resonate to you, try a new fitness class, neighborhood meet up, or social group- you never know what connections could be waiting for you unless you put forth effort and put yourself out there!

Just like relationships with family, colleagues, and even romantic relationships, break-ups do not have to last forever. Sometimes a “break” is necessary to move and shift within the relationship and taking time and space from a friendship can help heal some of the broken parts within the dynamic. Other times, a friendship breakup is the healthiest decision for all. All of these experiences help us grow as individuals and teaches us lessons on not only how to be a friend to others, but a friend to ourselves.

Are you struggling with a friendship breakup? We have several relationship therapists at Serene Mind who can help you process these transitions and explore these relationship dynamics. If you feel you need support, please feel free to reach out to us at hello@serenemindpysch.com, or call us at 813.321.8280. We are here to help you while you continue on your path!

10 Keys to A Healthy Friendship - From a Mental Health Counselor

Friendship is an essential part of our lives. Friends can bring the joy, support, and companionship we need to thrive. However, not all friendships are healthy. It is important to recognize which friends are bringing positivity into your life, and focus on building upon those strong foundations, rather than expending energy towards a toxic friendship.

Here are 10 qualities to look for in a great friend:

1. They respect your boundaries

2. They build you up, rather than tear you down

3. They make you laugh

4. They support you during the good and the bad times

5. They are non-judgmental

6. They reciprocate the effort you put into the friendship

7. They are dependable

8. They actively listen to you

9. They love and accept you just the way you are

10. They are loyal and trustworthy

Remember, friendships are a two-way street; these are traits you should also strive to possess in order to be a great friend yourself.

5 Keys to a Healthy Relationship - From Our Therapists

Relationships are tricky. There are ups and downs, unforeseen obstacles, and they require both partners to be putting in effort in order to last. While it’s true that every relationship is different, there are practices that can be generally applied to building a healthy relationship.

Here are some key components of a healthy relationship:

1. Communication:

Open and honest communication is arguably the most important part of a healthy relationship. Communication is a two-way street; you and your partner must be able to express thoughts and emotions, but also actively listen to what the other has to say. This will allow you and your partner to be on the same page and know what one another’s expectations are for the relationship. Do not be afraid to have uncomfortable conversations – bottling up your emotions rather than communicating them will hurt your relationship in the long run.

2. Respect:

In a healthy relationship, you and your partner must have mutual respect, even if you don’t always agree with them. Respecting your partner’s beliefs or boundaries means working to understand where they are coming from, and not trying to change them. Always treat your partner how you would want to be treated.

3. Boundaries:

Setting and respecting boundaries is a fundamental part of a healthy relationship. It’s best to clearly establish clear boundaries early on in the relationship.

4. Trust:

Trust is not given automatically; it is something that takes time and effort to build between partners. Show your partner, through both words and actions, that you follow through on commitments and keep your word.

5. Support:

Provide your partner with positivity and encouragement as you support them. The form support takes depends on your partner’s needs. Communication is key in determining how you can best support your partner.

Relationships are hard work. You have to nurture your relationship in order for it to bloom and become the type of relationship you want for yourself.

5 Ways to Spring Clean your Mental + Physical Health

See ya, Florida winter!

it is basically summer here, so what does that mean for us? 

SPRING CLEANING for your mental health! 

Maybe this means cleaning those top shelves that are too difficult to dust, getting outside and freshening up your flower bed, or clearing out some space in your mind for more room to bloom, this time of year calls for reorganization, decluttering, refreshing and cleaning! 

This month we are going to talk about building effective workout and mindfulness habits. It is often difficult to enjoy working out your body, the same way it may be hard to sit with your emotions while working out your mind. To maintain a balance within our lives, it is necessary to promote healthy lifestyle behaviors. 

Here are 5 Ways to Improve Your Mental and Physical Health:

1. Declutter your social media account: it is okay to remove and delete influencers and friends who are dampening your online space. Being on social media can be fun, educational and healthy if you follow the right people. Remember to take breaks, and not overwhelm yourself with comparisons.

2. Reorganize your pantry: taking the time to donate and recycle foods that you do not eat, or foods that may cause you bloating, inflammation or just plain make you feel blah are a great idea. Sometimes having access to unhealthy options makes it easier for us to choose those foods. If you limit what you purchase, you can make better choices on what you eat. What we eat has a great impact on both our mental and physical health.

3. Grow new friendships: making new friends takes bravery, going out of your comfort zone, common interests and knowing your value. Try initiating a conversation with someone who has similar interests and values. You never know, this might be the start of a great, new connection.

4. Spruce up your exercise routine: you can make time to make your exercise routine fun and different. By using different muscles and exercises you grow both mentally and physically. Since the weather is nicer, you can take your routine outdoors or maybe even the beach.

5. Clean out your negative thoughts: take the time to connect with your thoughts and process how you are thinking. Sometimes we fly by our day not realizing how much negativity we carry. Take the load off and journal, meditate and change these thoughts.

Having a new perspective and the time to build new habits can help us feel more in control of our lives. By balancing your mind, body and soul you are able to grow in a balanced direction. This can make stress easier to manage, boundaries easier to set and relationships more positive.